爱一个人是要经得起考验！

其实我的心里隐藏了许多说不出口的话，我很想对你说，但是总是说不出口，因为我怕我伤害到你，所以到现在我都不说，不要生气我怪我说话说一半，因为我要你自己想想。我承认我是很爱你很想和你在一起，我也知道你的心，你不敢去面对，我不逼你。我要你清楚知道的是你要懂得自己要的是什么！需要的是什么！我没有逼你接受我和我一起。你每次都告诉我你不会是个好女友，那么你所谓的坏女友就是不能时常陪我吗？陪不陪不是问题！年龄也不是个问题！重点是你爱不爱！陪家人是一定要的，但是你有没有为你自己想想你的未来？不要去爱是借口，是你不敢去爱，你怕被伤害，问世间有谁不怕被伤害？有谁没被男友或女友深深的伤害过？女生总说只有男生会伤害女生会欺骗女生，厌倦了就分，那么女生有没有想过男生也有被女生伤害过？爱一个人是要经得起考验！

別再騙自己

你曾告訴我愛一個不愛你的人是不值得的，這我知道，但是我希望我能夠打動你的心，我不懂我有沒有打動過你的心，我只知道我嚇跑了你，對不起！其實我不懂你在想什么，就算懂也好，我也當著不懂。就在昨天，你發信息給我，我遲了一小時才回你信息，你已經生氣我了，如果你不在意我，你根本不需要生氣，就是因為你在意你在乎，所以你才會生氣，你騙得了其他人，騙不了自己的。

對不起，我做錯了

李佩婷，對不起我做錯了。我承認我那天是吃醋，那晚我喝了很多酒！我知道你一定會說我孩子氣！這幾天我對你不理不睬是因為我真的不懂我還能做些什么！我是真的很愛你！我無法欺騙自己的感覺！我知道你曾告訴我說dont let the feeling control u..你對我說過的每一句話我是永遠都不會忘記的！我看見你facebook寫著你好像對他心動了，那時我真的崩潰了！我真的很想知道他是誰！雖然我不知道他是誰，但我的心很痛！真的真的很痛！今天我抱著你時我不想再放開手，我真的真的很想把你抱進我懷里直到永遠！我對你的愛是認真的！我希望你能給個機會我。能告訴我他是誰嗎？是不是henry?

回家乡休息了几天

最近发生了很多令我不开心的事。回家乡休息了几天，心情也愉快多了。昨天我在怡保和我的“妹妹”见面后就与我在网上认识的女性朋友见面，我们在网上交谈和手机短信交谈已有半年多了，这是我们第一次见面。可是并没有第一次见面的感觉，感觉好像天天都见面，就像从小一起玩到大的好朋友，那种感觉真的很舒服真叫人怀念。我们吃了午餐后就走走看看衣服，之后我们就去唱K。我们在里面疯疯癫癫了两个小时，唱了很多首歌，我从来没有那么开心那么疯狂过。其实我不是很会唱歌也不大喜欢唱歌，可是很奇怪的就是当我和她一起时就变得像另一个我似的。和她在一起的时间并不长只是短短的几个小时，但和她一起说说笑笑疯疯癫癫的感觉真的很舒服，就像在谈恋爱的感觉。当我们要各自回家时，我们都拥有同样的心情，就是舍不得离开对方。我一直陪伴着她去拿车看着她上车帮她关车门，突然她落泪了，她下车和我拥抱了几分钟。在我们拥抱的当儿，她告诉我和我在一起的感觉真的很舒服很开心，顿时我呆了一下。我答应她今年我会让她有个难忘的生日，因为她从来没有庆祝过生日。她是独生女，她家里比较严格，家人的思想比较传统，所以我就给了她这个诺言。今天，我去银行贷款了三十四千，签名签到手软，向银行贷款真的很麻烦。下午我就拿了五百块去订购，之后就拿我爸的车去修理，一修理就花了四百多块，短短几天的休息就花了大约三千块，真的要人命！很快的一天就这样过去了，明天又要一早开车到吉隆坡工作。现在我需要更加的勤力工作，我有了另一个负担。

靜靜的

天漸漸的暗了，月亮也出來了，而我呢？就靜靜地坐在床邊看者你的照片。每當我看見你那燦爛的笑容，我也替你開心。重要的是你開心，我開心或不開心也不重要，我覺得我在你心裏根本是沒有任何的地位，因爲我不是你的“乾弟弟”，我只是一個無名無姓的人。我真的很想和你永遠在一起，希望你做我一輩子的伴侶，可惜我不是你要的那杯茶。每當和你在一起的時候我都當你接受了我，我這麽想都是要自己好過一點，但事實上你并沒有接受過我。我知道我們的年齡有一段距離，我知道你過不了你自己那扇門，因爲我和你妹妹同歲。我知道你不喜歡被人逼，我不逼你。我希望你能給你我一個機會，不管結局是如何，我都接受，別怕會傷害到我。我知道我關心你呵護你都已經超出了界限，我知道你不喜歡，但我就是這樣！無法改變的事實！我真的好愛你！我不會讓我心愛的人受傷害！

時間過得真快

時間過得真快，一轉眼我在吉隆坡的日子就快一年了。想起剛來吉隆坡的時候，我只是一個做書展的partime...之后就在十一月，在The Mines舉辦了一場書香。在書香里，我扮演著收銀者的角色，每天都忙著收錢，忙得喘不過氣來，就連吃飯時間都沒有！一天只是吃一餐而已，還是一早忙到傍晚四五點才有得吃，才吃完就繼續工作，那時只是休息短短的十分鐘而已！真慘！之后，在十二月一號我正式進入諾文工作。剛踏入諾文的時候，感覺真的很陌生，有點不自在。哈哈！日子久了，和同事們開始有說有笑，好開心哦！在諾文工作的日子過得很快，一天一天的過，一天一天的改變。如今，我在大眾書局的總公司里已認識很多人了。最近我和我以前最要好的朋友和好了，好開心噢！她的名字就叫陳顏穎。在念著小學的時候，我曾經與她有過一段曖昧。哈哈！

boring day

today is Sunday...very boring ar...no way for me to go...just stay at home sleep sleep sleep...i dream of her again...early in the morning, my dear sms me and told me that she is very sleepy...then i sms with her lol...after few minutes, i go on the computer and facebook friendster again...haha...everyday also repeat do the same things...boring lah my life...at night, im going having dinner with my uncle family and my cousin's garl garl...haha...we go taman maluri there eat steamboat...

all black on friday

today is Friday...is Carmen "xiao peng you" last day in Novum Organum...the day before Carmen last day, it was Thursday...she told me that Friday wear black clothes...alamak...i don't have black clothes lah...haha...that night i work overtime till 8.30pm...then i go the mines shopping mall buy black formal clothes...i go G2000 and have a look...yeah...finally i found a black colour formal clothes...im very happy...i quickly go and try the clothes...the size is suitable for me...cause last time when i try the G2000 clothes...the size not suitable for...it was very big size...but now is suitable for me...hehe...the clothes just RM100...very cheap...Friday is coming...i wake up early in the morning...i can't sleep well whole night...i go bath then wear whole black formal look...hehe...wear whole black formal clothes really look nice...hehe...after working, we go IOI mall "REDBOX" sing k...damn...traffic jam...some more petrol wanna empty...lucky the way go IOI mall have petrol station...if not, die lol...around 11pm then we went home...when i reach home was round 1am...good luck to Carmen "xiao peng you" wish you all the best...

coming soon

dear, i love you...i hope you will always accompany by my side...dear, im really really very tired...the day that im waiting is coming soon...that's after KLCC bookfair...finally i can have a rest...no need to work...i wanna go back and have a nice day with my brother...i miss him so much...

愛不一定要擁有

“喜歡和愛有什麽分別？”這是一個很深的問題，如果你問愛因斯坦他也未必會回答，簡單來説：“愛是占有！”
你喜歡一個人，只想和她或他交個朋友，他或她做什麽事和你沒有多大關係。她或他和異性朋友喝茶，你不會介意。相反的，你愛一個人就是“占有”，他只屬於你一人，最好二十四小時向你報到。她或他和異性朋友出街，你會吃醋。
以前不懂，男女之間一定要談戀愛嗎？中學生的感情，從喜歡到愛，最後演變成恨。到時，在學校走廊擦肩而過，會假裝看不見對方。戀愛的快樂很短暫，接下來要面對很多問題，壓力，一旦處理不好，就會分手在雨中。
兩個人相愛不一定會有好結果。可能再錯的時間，遇到對的人；或者在對的時間，遇到錯的人。
其實愛情很微妙和講求緣分。“曾經真心相愛，一定會有感覺的”
就算不能擁有或在一起，曾經的“感覺”將會是很美好的回憶。

時間能倒流嗎？

那麽多年以來我對我做過的事從不後悔，但是有件事讓我感到后悔。時間能倒流嗎？能回到從前嗎？如果能的話，我絕不會讓它發生！兩年半了，足足兩年半了！我還是無法放下，我說我已經放下了一切，那只是自己騙自己而已！我不想再過這樣的生活，我真得好辛苦好累！有時真的很想閉上眼睛永不睜開！但如今，我找到了我愛的人，可惜我不是她要的那杯茶。也許我們有緣無份吧！我不祈求她接受我，我只祈求在我離開前能夠和她有個美好的回憶！

烦！！！

这几天真的很烦很衰！骑摩托就差点给车撞，驾车就撞人的车尾，还赔他两百块！气死我啦！我就快要疯了！究竟是什么事情？为什么会发生在我身上？为什么？我做错了什么？为何要这样惩罚我？救命啊！我的心口又再次的痛了，我真得很害怕！我怕我接受不了事实。。。

im very very sorry to you

yesterday i was watching "transformers" alone at c.c...i really hope she will accompany me watch movie in the cinema...suddenly my colleague sms me that tomorrow means today, Sunday, she ask me come out having breakfast with her...she told me that every time i ask her out she also don't want...so this time she ask me out...this morning we having breakfast in McDonald...haha...very funny lah...this is the 2nd times i having my breakfast in McDonald...after finish having breakfast, she wanna told me somethings...but she looks like not dare say it in front of me...she say she prefer told me with sms...finally she told me also...what she told me i also get it...i know the mean...if she wanna told me somethings that will hurt me...just say it...i will listen...don't scare that i get hurt...she told me that yesterday she nearly cry le...i know she wont accept me even how much i do for her...i just wanna treat her good...for now, i treat her good not means she need to accept me as her "bf"...i just wanna have a nice memories with her before i leave...that's all...Wendy, im very very sorry to you because all the things i have do for you have make you scare make you afraid of me...im seldom say sorry to people and i don't like people say sorry to me when they have hurt me because i hate"sorry"this word...actually that time i sms her n asking her where are she? im still at home...after i sms her that i will be there soon, i quickly go and take my car and drive as fast as i can...all is because i wan see her...but traffic jam...make me late le...when i was arrive, she has go buy bread and eat...i really don't know she go there because of the popular card...i though she go there just meet her friend...i really very stupid ar!!! if i know it early, i wont go back home and i will be there accompany her...can't accompany her having lunch...then i say i wan accompany her having dinner but she told me she will having dinner with "Vincent" and she ask me go back...fine...maybe she know maybe she don't know...never mine...is ok...at that time i feel that what i do really useless...on the way i went home...i don't know why my tears will drop and my mood become very down...before reach home, i u-turn and go saloon cut my hair and wash my hair...after the malay garl "urut" my head, i feel a bit better then before...after that i went home and bath...then go "jusco maluri" shopping...i have buy a new "hush puppies" polo t...that's "best buy" item...just RM69.90...then go home lol...

really sick lol...

today early in the morning raining lol...very cold oo...i feel very tired and lazy go work because i get fever and sore throat and some coryza...hehe...finally i also go to work...today i lose one's appetite...just drink a cup of hot ''teh tarik'' at mamak then go in office start working lol...i feel more cold and sleepy and suddenly my manager call me and ask me go inside his room discuss the STS outlet bookfair...after i stay inside his room, i feel more more cold and cant attend to listen what he was talking about...hehe...after finish discuss, then was time for lunch lol...today i just eat mee nia...when we finish having lunch, was time back to work lol...finally i beh tahan lol...i go ''HR'' to take the letter then told my assistant manager that i want go see doctor...after that i go back home take my jacket then go back office continue work...haha...then i eat pill...after that i become blur blur le...die lol...don't know how to drive car back home loh...haiz...but i still drive car go back...haha...after reach home then go bath go eat dinner then eat pill then sleep lol...hehe..today i will sleep early because sick lol...but i still will msn awhile...hehe...dear, good night...muack...

i sick le...

yesterday i feel very cold...i feel that i fever le...but i stil don't wan to care it and continue work...suddenly i feel my throat become pain and more pain...really beh tahan!!then i go gereral store and buy a bottle of 100plus...i can't sleep well whole night...keep wake up and drink water and go toilet...very trouble ar!!

blur blur + bad day

today is a bad day...early in the morning on the way go to work...when i was wear my shoes in car, suddenly my car automatic move and knock other people's car...the garl say my car knock her car harder...but i just feel that just kissing softly nia...my car and her car don't have any injured...she take my hp no and my name...she say after she take her car go for checking...if got any problem then will phone me...what the fxxk...only kissing softly...won't get any injured lah!!!her car and my car also same type...if her car got injured...then my car ma more injured...after that i going to office and work...when the time going to 11am, i receive a call from JBP outlet...she ask me the outlet credit memo...im blur blur to tell her that i have finish done the credit memo...after end the call, i go and double check...i found that i key in wrong outlet...the credit memo is for JBP outlet but i key in to PBJ outlet...i don't know why this few weeks i always do wrong things...maybe im too tired...after working, i go playing badminton with my friends...my happy time is playing bidminton...other time im unhappy...because im alone...i love her so much..i know she won't accept me...but i really hope she will give me a chance...i just wan have a nice memories with her...

moody

today im moody...im not enough sleep ar! this few days i cant sleep well whole night...and my heart is pain...sometimes pain sometimes not pain...when the time is pain, really very pain till i cant do anything...my friend told me that maybe im got heart attack...but my family members no one is heart attack...im very worry it...im really scare that is heart attack...

我以为我能放得下

我以为我能放得下，原来我还很在乎！
爱来的时候
是真的
爱走的时候
是真的

被你伤害的人还真实的存在
你却生活中伤害你身边的人
真实的爱情
结束在真实的欺骗

在被真实的欺骗和伤害下
你失去了真实的爱情
有谁会理解你现在真实的伤害？
有谁会理解你当初真实的爱情？

她说得没错

我知道你爱我，我知道你对我好， 可感情是不能因为这些而免强的， 谢谢你对我的爱我会记住你的好， 一辈子。。。这句话她说得没错，感情是不能勉强的，是我一厢情愿罢了。。。我并不是她要的那杯茶！

睡不着

今晚我睡不着，脑海里全是她！想的念的都是她！希望她能成为我的另一伴

希望我的希望不会再是个失望

现在我想要的就是能够和她天天在一起，开开心心的。我不想在每个角度每个事情都认真地过，我只会在工作的时候认真。和朋友在一起时又何必要那么认真呢？认真的话，怎能开心？和朋友一起，就是要疯疯癫癫才过瘾的才开心！希望我的希望不会再是个失望，希望你明白我的意思。

Mood is down

My mood is very down...after work, im going to buy 5 bottle beer go home drink...im feel sadness...because many things happen to me... i love her so much...but she don't love me...anywhere, i won't give up...is that worth to love someone who don't love you?

难得星期天出去走走

今天是星期天哦！哈哈！一直以来的每个星期天我都会呆在家里看戏睡觉信息，但是今天和几位同事出去，去哪里呢？就是去一家新开的书店"GRAMEDIA BOOKSTORE"今天十一点我们就出发去吃早餐，吃了早餐后我们就出发去SETIA ALAM TESCO的"GRAMEDIA BOOKSTORE"为什么我们会去呢？因为对方要求我们邀请"蛋糕情缘"的作者"刘燕霞"到那里示范如何做蛋糕。这个示范是在下午二时三十分开始，但是因为作者走错路线，所以延迟到三时十五分才开始。之后作者给大家是吃她在家里已准备好的"cheese cake"她做的蛋糕真的很好吃！哈哈！时间过得很快，一下就过去了。接着我们便到巴生去吃"肉骨茶"哈哈哈！可是不是很好吃，都是在"klang perade"后面的那间"肉骨茶"比较好好吃!吃完后，当然是回家咯!哈哈!回到家都已经是晚上七点多了，好累噢！

借酒消愁

昨晚是小JOE的fairwell..我喝了很多酒，但是我还是很清醒，要醉的时候却偏偏不能醉。我真的很想她很爱她！昨晚八点多开始喝酒喝到十二点多才回家，当我一上车时，我突然有种晕晕的感觉，但是我还是驾车回家。虽然我身边还有一个人陪，但我却没告诉她我开始晕了，因为我不想任何人担心，所以我选择沉默。当我送她回家后我自己也回家，回到家，我呆在车里几分钟后才进家。进家后突然有种要呕的感觉，之后真的呕了，好辛苦，过后我便上楼睡觉了。凌晨三点多我接了一通电话就赶到大城堡再过几条街那里载我堂哥回家。当时我还在晕晕着，当我还是驾车到那边在他，然后他在我回家。哈哈哈哈哈！今早起身，头好痛噢！但是我还是到公司上班。

缘分

我和她有缘无份吗?
我真的很爱她！
很想她！
最近心情非常低落，
没人知道.
每天都要挂着开心的面具,
好累啊!

最近的心情很差

不知怎么了？我的脑海里总是空白的，好辛苦！面对我爱的她，有很多话想和她说，但我总是没说出口。我很想她很想抱着她！

平凡的幸福，但愿每人都了解

世界上有太多的不明不白，每一件事情的结局都不一定能找寻到所谓的理由。在最开始的那一天我们都要明白游戏会有终结的一天，结果是好是坏也许是人为的。当我们痛苦地问为什么，为什么我和她会走步到尽头？为什么我会这么痛苦？为什么？难道我不够好吗？。。。的时候，我们必须明白每一个为什么只会把自己推入痛苦的边缘~也许每人都有一些缺点，当中的包容和体谅相信也不是每个人都能做到的，错过了再自责也是无补于事的，曾经自己无法明白现在的这些话，让自己陷入一次又一次的漩涡里。眼泪流得太多会麻木/心中怨恨得太多会放弃…在这过程中我们会错失了太多东西，太多机会~看见身边的朋友痛苦的向我哭诉，我无法做些什么，但唯一能做的就是把我自己曾经体会过的心情，感受全都说出来。在这时候我明白什么都会听不进去的，时间是伤痛的解药，每个人的生命中不一定要激情，起伏的，平凡的幸福会比任何东西都来得长久。。双方的努力+互相的体谅=幸福的爱情。

曾经爱过你

傻傻的想了很久
却依然想不出分开的理由
你走的时候用沉默代替了分手
是你太残忍还是我太认真
如果爱情可以瞬间忘记
我又何苦那么的爱你
冰冷的空气
穿透我的身体
冰冻我的心
你能看到我留在屏幕上的字
却看不到我滴在键盘上的泪
眼泪的滋味 好象苦水
我会记着你的好
一辈子
为你落下最后一滴泪
不再哭泣
也许某天还会笑着想起你
写下的日记 都是回忆
只希望你可以在你的心里
留下我的身影...
落下的泪滴 是为了你
也为了证明我曾经真的
爱过你

温柔哭了

醒在一个五点的清晨
傻傻的看着痛过的伤痕
身边没有你真的有点冷
此刻你的爱　谁温存
你留给我最后的心疼
让我很难再去爱任何人
尝试着把你 从回忆牺牲
没想到爱依然执着的等
温柔哭了崩溃了
爱的恋的都累了
感情这条路究竟通往何方
年少轻狂是不是註定流浪
温柔哭了崩溃了
爱的恋的都醒了
痴心的脚步究竟何去何往
恐怕永远都找不到安定的天堂